Lessons of the Heart Read online

  Lessons of the Heart

  Copyright © 2016 by Jodie Larson

  Without limiting the rights under copyright reserved above, no part of this publication may be reproduced, stored in or introduced into a retrieval system, or transmitted, in any form, or by any means (electronic, mechanical, photocopying, recording, or otherwise) without the prior written permission of the above author of this book.

  This book is a work of fiction. Names, characters, places, brands, media and incident are either the product of the author’s imagination or are used fictitiously.

  The author acknowledges the trademarked status and trademark owners of various products referenced in this work of fiction, which have been used without permission. The publication/use of these trademarks is not authorized, associated with, or sponsored by the trademark owners.

  Cover Design by Murphy Rae at Indie Solutions by Murphy Rae

  www.murphyrae.net

  Interior Design by Champagne Formats

  www.champagneformats.com

  Editor: Melinda Utendorf

  Table of Contents

  Title Page

  Copyright

  Quote

  One

  Two

  Three

  Four

  Five

  Six

  Seven

  Eight

  Nine

  Ten

  Eleven

  Twelve

  Thirteen

  Fourteen

  Fifteen

  Sixteen

  Seventeen

  Eighteen

  Nineteen

  Twenty

  Twenty-One

  Twenty-Two

  Twenty-Three

  Twenty-Four

  Twenty-Five

  Twenty-Six

  Twenty-Seven

  Twenty-Eight

  Twenty-Nine

  Thirty

  Thirty-One

  Epilogue

  Acknowledgements

  About the Author

  I truly believe that everything that we do and everyone that we meet is put in our path for a purpose. There are no accidents; we’re all teachers – if we’re willing to pay attention to the lessons we learn, trust our positive instincts and not be afraid to take some risks or wait for some miracle to come knocking at our door. – Marla Gibbs

  “WHY DO I FEEL LIKE I’m pulling teeth to get you to go to this party? You should have some fun before we’re too old to enjoy it.”

  I shut my book and sigh. “It’s not that I’m opposed to partying. I just don’t actively want to participate in the stupidity of our generation. Is it so wrong to sit at home and read a book or study to get good grades in school?”

  Penny stops pacing and raises an eyebrow. “The stupidity of our generation? Really? What are you, eighty?”

  Her comment makes me laugh. “I’m just saying that going out and getting wasted is not my idea of a good time.”

  “But it’s senior year. It’s our last chance to be stupid and crazy before we enter the real world.”

  I rise from my bed and walk over to the window that overlooks our backyard. It’s mid-September and the chill of autumn is in full force. A cold gust of wind pushes against the window, making it moan with the sudden assault. Autumn in Connecticut is supposedly the most beautiful time of the year. The trees are beginning to turn, leaving their green hue for a more golden yellow with red and orange scattered in there.

  Penny comes up and wraps her arms around me before giving me a supporting squeeze. “Please, Britta? For one night, I want you to forget about getting good grades or preparing to be the world’s greatest doctor. Be reckless.” She pauses before pulling out the big guns. “You don’t want me to celebrate our mutual birthday alone, do you?”

  I glance over my shoulder. “You really know how to lay on the guilt, don’t you?”

  Penny presses a kiss to my cheek. “It’s my special talent. Besides, I told everyone to be there for our party so you have to come.”

  I pat her arm and lean my head against hers. “What would I do without you?”

  “Die of boredom?”

  I laugh and retake my position on the bed. “Probably.”

  “Who knows, maybe Chase will be there.”

  I scrunch my nose. “Ugh, I hope not. That boy will not take a hint.”

  Penny laughs. “What can I say? The boy loves you.”

  Chase Woodward and I have been friends since first grade. Sometime around puberty, things started to change and Chase was beginning to act differently around me. It’s been a fight to keep him at arm’s length, but who wants to be in a relationship with someone who hasn’t quite matured past the age of twelve?

  “Maybe I’ll get lucky and he won’t show up.”

  Penny tosses a pillow in the air next to me. “Or you’ll go there and fall madly in love with him and his boyish charms.”

  I grab the pillow. “Gee, thanks, friend.”

  “I can just see you both at our ten-year reunion, all married with babies everywhere…”

  WHACK! A pillow to her face.

  We fall all over each other in a fit of laughter.

  A knock comes at my door, and my brother, Liam, walks in, grinning a sideways smile toward Penny.

  “And just what is going on in here? Shouldn’t there be an Enigma song playing and the both of you in your underwear?” He pauses for a moment. “Well, maybe just Penny.”

  I roll my eyes and launch the pillow at his head. “Get out of my room, perv!”

  Liam ignores me and walks into my room. He sits on the chair at my desk and gives Penny a once over.

  “So Pen, how’s it going?”

  She leans back on her arms in a casual yet seductive pose. “It’s going well, Liam. How’s it hanging in your world?”

  “Long and strong, baby. Long and strong.”

  I make gagging noises. “Could you be any more inappropriate?”

  Both of them laugh. Liam has had a crush on Penny for as long as I can remember. He would always try to be in the room with us, even if we were doing something he hated. He used to flick stuff at her or lightly tease her about some silly rumor going around the school. I think the day I knew for sure was in junior high when he beat up Chad Lortimer after making her cry.

  “Don’t be like that, little sis,” he says, giving me his puppy dog eyes.

  “Those eyes only work for people who aren’t me. Now, is there anything I can help you with, before you can leave?”

  “I need to get going anyway,” Penny says. “My mom said if I’m late coming home again she’s going to flip her shit.”

  Penny stands and stretches her arms above her head. Liam ogles her as his eyes fall upon the flash of skin at her stomach that’s now visible. It makes me want to throw another pillow at him.

  I stand and hug her, making sure I block Liam’s view. “Call me later?”

  Penny pulls away and nods. “Definitely. We have plans to make. You won’t be sorry! Bye, Britta. Bye, Liam.” She waves and lets her long red hair hang over her shoulder. He waves back and watches her walk out. I close the door behind her and glare at him.

  He gives me an innocent look “What did I do now?”

  I smack him on his shoulder before taking my perch back on my bed. “Stop ogling my best friend. It’s creepy, and it’s not going to happen.”

  “Never say never.”

  “What do you want?”

  “You’re going out with Penny tomorrow?” he asks, his voice tinged with nerves.

  I cock my head to the side and narrow my eyes. “Yeah. Why?”

  He looks nervous as he picks at his jeans and flicks off some invisible lint. “Will you call me if you need a ride or anything like that? It’
s just…I know how these high school parties can go….”

  “This isn’t the first time we’ve been out before. Besides, would you willingly let your baby sister and the woman of your obsession go out into the cold, dark night and have unspeakable things happen to them?”

  “Fuck no. That’s why I’m asking you to call me in case things get out of control. You know I would never let anything happen to you or Penny.”

  I sigh. “Yeah, I know. But we’ll be okay. And if things get uncomfortable or weird, you’ll be the first person I call. Deal?”

  “Deal.”

  Liam visibly relaxes and it makes me smile. He may only be sixteen months older than I am, but I swear we’re more like twins. And it’s sweet that he cares so much about the both of us. I don’t know what I’d do without him.

  A muffled beep comes from his pocket and he pulls out his phone. He types something across the screen before locking it again. “Gotta go. Douchenozzle is waiting for me.”

  I roll my eyes. “Why do you hang out with him if he’s a douchenozzle?”

  He shrugs. “Cause he works at a strip joint and has the connections to, you know…”

  I jam my fingers in my ears and squeeze my eyes shut. “Don’t want to hear it.”

  He ruffles my hair on his way out and closes the door behind him. I lie on my stomach, looking at the pictures that line the head of my bed. There’s a picture of Penny and me when we camped in the backyard. We couldn’t have been more than seven or eight. Several from our combined family vacation to Boston; one after Penny had just caught a foul ball at Fenway. But my favorite one is from the winter formal last year of us looking perfectly elegant and happy.

  Penny’s right. This is our senior year. It’s our last year to enjoy our adolescence, be a little reckless before being thrust into the adult world.

  Except I am ready for adulthood. I pick up my book and try to distract myself from wondering just what exactly I’m getting myself into.

  “DID YOU HEAR THE NEWS?” Penny asks me, linking her arm through mine.

  “Probably not. I get all my gossip from you and since this is the first time I’ve seen you all morning I’m out of the loop.”

  She steers us to our lockers before propping herself against it. “Mr. Ward was fired last night.”

  I shut my locker with slightly more force than I intended to. “Are you kidding me? Why? I loved him.”

  Penny shrugs. “Word on the street is he was caught having sex with a student.”

  I turn and my jaw drops. “No way! Who? I mean, not that Mr. Ward isn’t handsome, but he’s just, I don’t know…”

  “Old? Unfunny? Flaccid?”

  I snort at her last comment. “Gross. I don’t know. He always seemed to be so friendly to everyone.”

  “Obviously a little too friendly.”

  “Who was it? Do you know?”

  She shakes her head. “No one has said who, but I checked the absentee list at the office this morning and Krista Baker was listed.”

  “Oh my God, she is such a skank. That would totally be right up her alley. He was probably failing her and she needed some extra credit.”

  “That’s my guess too.”

  Penny slams her locker and checks her watch. “You going to American Lit now?” I ask her.

  She groans loudly, making a few heads turn in the process. “Fuck, don’t remind me. The witch has it out for me and I’m supposed to give my speech today on F. Scott Fitzgerald.”

  “Did you read The Great Gatsby like you were supposed to?”

  “Pfft. Why read the book when there’s a movie out?”

  I pause outside the door and give her a sideways glance. “Which one?”

  “Duh, the one with Leo in it.”

  “Good luck. That one isn’t true to the book. Half of it is way off the mark and the parts that are close aren’t even worth it.”

  Penny steps into the doorway. “I’ll be okay. You know me. I can always talk myself out of a situation.”

  I pat her on the shoulder. “That you can. See you later, crazy.”

  We wave goodbye and I head to the teacher’s lounge for my fourth-period class. Since I didn’t want to take two study halls, I volunteered to be a teacher’s assistant instead. Mrs. Davis refused my volunteer work because she said it wouldn’t show up on my transcript. So for two hours each day I’m her assistant, doing all the stuff that she hates doing. Not that I mind grading papers or creating tests. It’s actually quite fun. I love the fact that I get to be away from the prying eyes of the student body and the gossip that always fills the halls, even if it’s only for a few hours.

  Gossip, like poor Mr. Ward. I highly doubt he would have slept with a student. Because let’s face it, Penny’s description of him was dead on. He was a middle-aged man with a receding hairline and a mild beer gut. Not exactly someone that I would lay my academic career on the line for. That sort of stigma stays with you forever.

  I pull out the chair to my desk and open the grade book, entering in the numbers from the last few assignments over all her classes. Each pile is separated out by period and alphabetized so I can find everything quickly. Yes, I’m kind of a stickler for that, the need to have everything in a place so it can be found. There’s a reason why the place exists. Neat and tidy and in order is how I prefer things. Otherwise, it’s chaos. And chaos and I do not get along well.

  After a half hour, I stretch my neck, getting a small kink in it after hunching over the book without moving. There’s murmuring down the hall from a couple teachers who usually take their lunch break at this time.

  “Did you hear about Adam? So sad but really it was kind of stupid on his part,” someone says.

  “I heard he was sleeping with a student.”

  “No, that’s a lie. He wasn’t sleeping with a student. He was sleeping with Garrett’s wife.”

  I silently gasp as I eavesdrop on the conversation. Holy shit, Mr. Ward was sleeping with the principal’s wife? No wonder he was fired.

  “No! With Melissa?”

  “Yep. They ran off together when Garrett confronted them. I guess he saw them having dinner and waited until they were done. Followed them to Adam’s house and that’s where it all went down.”

  “Wow. Just when you think you know a guy.”

  “I know. Too bad.”

  I tune the harpies out, going back to my work until I hear the bell for the end of the fifth period. Gathering up the assignment book, I start walking back toward Mrs. Davis’s desk when I run into something. I sprawl on the floor, my ass pounding in discomfort as the papers and book skitter away from me.

  “Damn,” I mutter to myself.

  That’s when I start to look up and see it wasn’t a something I ran into but a someone. A really tall someone. A really handsome someone with green eyes and a head full of disheveled brown hair. My throat tightens and my heart beats just a smidge faster as I look up from my squatted position.

  “Are you okay? I’m so sorry. I didn’t see you there,” he says as he reaches down to grab my hand.

  I place my shaking hand in his and am amazed how tightly he grips me. Not painful but strong, sure, almost as if he was meant to always hold my hand. The fit of our hands is perfect with just the right amount of symmetry.

  “Yeah I’m fine,” I grunt as he pulls me off the floor. I brush the dust off my jeans and sweater.

  “It’s my fault. I wasn’t paying attention to where I was going and then I got turned around back here. It’s kind of a maze.”

  “I hear you there. It took me a while to figure it out my first time back here. Are you new?”

  He gives me a smile that has my heart skipping a beat. Whoa. That’s a strange reaction.

  “I will be. I start on Monday, so I was just kind of wandering around trying to find stuff. I guess I got lost.”

  I laugh, and his smile widens. “I guess you did. Well, what are you looking for? Maybe I can help point you in the right direction.”

  He p
ulls out a piece of paper from his pocket and studies it for a second. While he’s looking over the paper, I take the moment to examine him further. He’s tall but not overly tall, and lean but not skinny. The long-sleeved shirt he’s wearing shows off enough to let me know he takes care of himself. Not buff but definitely muscular, judging from the way his body narrows at the waist. And he looks good in jeans. Really good. Damn good. Like the boy-next-door good.

  I shake my head, shameful of where my thoughts were going. I have no idea who this guy is or how he ended up back in the teacher’s lounge. But if he’s a new student starting Monday I need to find out what classes he has. Maybe this school year can be salvaged after all.

  “I’m looking for Mr. Herman’s office. Someone told me it was back this way.”

  I shake my head. “No, not back here. He’s in the main office, next to Mr. Leonard’s office. Mr. Herman is the vice principal.”

  He rolls his eyes and it makes me smile. It’s nice to know I’m not the only person who does that anymore.

  “Of course. I should have known that.” He looks around for an exit and returns my gaze with wide eyes. “So how do I get out of here?”

  “This way,” I say trying to suppress my giggle. I place the grade book and papers on Mrs. Davis’s desk and show the good-looking stranger the way out of the lounge.

  “Why do they make this so confusing?” he asks.

  “It’s difficult to say. My guess is so students don’t go wandering back here without permission. Unless you’re back there all the time, you never know whose office is whose or the way to get out without losing your mind.”

  “I’ve seen labyrinths that were easier to navigate than this.”

  I laugh and he smiles again at me. “Supposedly when the school got remodeled they forgot to add the teacher’s offices. So it was a last minute thing, throwing together walls behind this study room, hiding it from the students prying eyes.”

  “So the teachers have an office and a classroom?”

  I nod. “Yep. It’s better that way really. This way the students can’t break into the desks in the classrooms and change their grades and stuff like that.”